You don’t know where things took a turn for the worse. All you know is that you don’t recognize your relationship anymore. What went wrong? Was it something I did?
If you’re unsure of where things went wrong in your relationship, and you think you can still make your relationship work, then I’m here to assure you that there is still hope.
Here are 5 Powerful Ways to Fix a Broken Relationship:
In This Article:
- Listen to What Your Partner is Saying
- Show Genuine Compassion and Concern for Each Other
- Meditate on Better Times
- Don’t Bring Up Past Issues
- Make Him Feel Like Your Hero
1. Listen to What Your Partner is Saying
When one of you speaks, no matter the tone of voice, the other person needs to make eye contact (body language) and actively listen.
This means not thinking of responses or retorts. Practice active listening when arguing with your man. All people want is validation. They want to know you’re listening and that you validate their feelings.
Try to stop being the “righteous one” and remember that there are two of you in the room, and it’s ultimately not about being right. This might take a lot of effort, lol.
It’s about being heard. If your partner feels listened to then he’ll be much more likely to reciprocate.
2. Show Genuine Compassion and Concern for Each Other
Showing genuine compassion is the key to fixing a broken relationship. If you’re living in a constant state of resentment, it’s going to be hard to notice the good things about your man.
It’s going to be even harder to verbalize those things to him.
Trust me, I’ve been on both ends. I’ve spent much time in a long-term relationship so I know how hard it can be.
That’s why it’s important to take a step back, look beyond your anger and resentment and see your partner as a human being who is struggling.
This may be hard for you. But start with something small. If they’re irritated about something the smallest, “I’m sorry–that must really suck.” Will work WONDERS.
And what this will do, if done consistently, will help break the shell around both of you. You’ll begin feeling more loving, he’ll feel more loved, and in turn, he’ll be more loving to you. He’ll begin to focus on his partner’s needs.
3. Meditate on Better Times
I say “meditate” on purpose here rather than “think about.” When was the last time you genuinely enjoyed each other’s company?
- Was it on one of your regular date nights?
- Were you laughing at something he said?
- Better yet, was it an incredibly passionate night in bed?
- What made it such a good time?
Immerse yourself in that moment. Please close your eyes and visualize the location, what he was wearing, the sounds, the smells, the little things. Meditate on how you felt spending quality time together—focus on your love for him in those moments and how happy you were.
This exercise will remind you WHY you’re with him, why you fell in love with him in the first place. It’s easy to think constantly about the difficult times and what your partner has done to you.
It’s tough to remember and focus on the right things–back when you had a healthy relationship. But I urge you to look at this from a different perspective.
Meditate on why you loved him in the first place, on a daily basis, and I guarantee your resentment will begin to fade and you’ll be quicker to love. It’s a great way to move beyond anger.
4. Don’t Bring Up Past Issues
One of the easiest ways to heal past wounds is not to bring up past issues when you fight. When you’re arguing, it’s easy, in the heat of the moment, to bring up past issues to justify your stance. Even things that happened a long time ago.
But bringing up examples of his behavior and how it’s affected you in the past is more destructive than you might think.
He’ll begin to think that you have a laundry list of goods vs. bads in your head. And while you might very well have this list, if you keep bringing them up, he’ll feel like he’s under a magnifying glass and will constantly be on the defensive.
The hardest lesson I ever had to learn in my own intimate relationships was that my partner was never going to be 100% what I needed her to be. She was who she was. I couldn’t change her.
So where did the issue lay? With her or with me? With me. I needed to work on my own mental health and consider how my actions made my partner feel.
5. Make Him Feel Like Your Hero
I saved this point for last because it’s the most powerful way to fix a broken relationship.
This instinct within men holds an inconceivable amount of power to make a man devoted to you. And it comes down to this simple relationship hack:
Your man wants to be your hero.
He wants to fix your leaky faucets (hello!), fight battles for you, and keep you safe. It’s built into their core being. This “instinct” is known as The Hero Instinct.
This “Hero Instinct” is a BIOLOGICAL DRIVE…just like hunger, thirst, and sex. And once this drive is triggered, it becomes more powerful than all 3 combined. This is what makes it virtually impossible for him to ignore.
The best way for you to understand how you can unlock the Hero Instinct is to watch this free, short presentation, or click the button below, because who doesn’t like a button? Take the next step!
More helpful stuff:
The relationship advice that I’ve studied was authored by relationship expert James Bauer. He’s helped countless couples that had telltale signs of a broken relationship. In his course, he shows you how to fulfill your partner’s needs, even when you’ve gotten to a breaking point.
Even if you’ve been considering going to see a relationship counselor for couple’s therapy, I highly recommend giving this video a watch first.